My son came early in the morning and went with me to the market to buy food for Father’s day dinner at home. I treasure his love and commitment with the thought that it would be much simpler for him to take me to a restaurant for a good meal. He knew I always like eating at home to enjoy the festive moments for the sake of leisure and convenience, avoiding the hassles having to compete for a dining table and high costs. Most importantly he knew that the family concerto will not be diluted by the crowds of people eating outside. We bought three big fresh sea crabs, some scallops, a duck and a big chunk of fish meat of a gigantic garoupa that the whole fish would tip the weighing scale to its high end. We bought a lot of vegetables too. Seemingly delicacy could be expected that night if I did the cooking up to mark for which I did. We emptied 3 bottles of wine and the whole family was totally satisfied by such harmony. I was really a very happy father.

As I continued to savor the next day the sweet moments of that Father’s day, I also chewed on the delightful conversation in the car on the way to the market about my way of life and my marriage. He was very tactful on the words he used and the way his question was posted. All the years, he has cared and loved his parents very much especially my relationship with my wife. While he was more sympathetic toward his mother, but as he aged more I can see he has tried more to understand my stand from the perspective of a man not as a son. For sure as a father, I owe him some serious explanations and apologies. We should have explored this subject long ago. It is surely too bad that I have been dodging it all these years. It is time for me to stand up to him as I really would like him to understand what kind of a person his dad is once and for all.

My biggest mistake of life.

It was one of the mornings I was walking to the office in downtown Central. The time when I was around 32ish in 1978 or 1979, a young man with a wife and two kids, just changed to a new job trying to climb the ladder of career. To be realistic and put things to more context, at that time, as a 32-year old young man, I was open and subject to the influx of the things of life. I did not know what I exactly want of life. I still remember vaguely that at that age I could only think of buying a new Nikon camera and a piano for my daughter, Joyce.

Right in front of the entrance to the office building, there at the curb side a Mercedes Benz pulled up and  a young and pretty Asian woman, slightly pregnant, well dressed, got out, said something in English, kissed her man goodbye then breezed into the building. She did not notice I was watching so closely. There I was, standing, envious of the sweet moment I witnessed. Like in a movie, a young couple – the man smart and the woman pretty, the love story stunned me in such a way that I was fantasizing how nice it would be if my life would be that romantic too. Just within moments, the hustles of the traffic and the crowd of people in passing woke me up swiftly.  I quickly commanded that fantasy to disappear and went into the building to start my day of work in Swire House, the headquarters of Cathay Pacific. I found out a few days later that she was a colleague in a different department. Her office was not too far away from mine.

That was a very pretty memory that traced back so many years of life. However, I did not allow myself to dwell in it further, as deep down, as if destiny is mocking, something so casual and haphazard could cause a lot of twists and turns to my life and of course a lot of pains too, especially to my wife.